Monday, December 19, 2016

Poinsettias plus 3

I always enjoy fresh flowers, picked out of the yard or given to me sweetly by my boyfriend or children.
Thanks to Home Depot, here are three pet friendly, Holiday Season flowers to brighten any one's day.
Facts about poinsettias:
1. The poinsettia is a member of the Euphorbiaceae family aka  Euphorbia pulcherrima Wild in which there are 700-1000 species.
2. The poinsettia is native to Mexico.
3. Due to the brilliant color, The Indians (Aztecs) considered the poinsettia a symbol of purity.
4. According to www.petpoisonhelpline.com
The white milky SAP found in poinsettias contains a chemical called a diterpenoid Euphorbol esters and saponin like detergents. Though this plant has been said to be poisonous to children and animals, they generally are not.
Signs of ingested plant are just mild dermal irritation, possible vomiting, drooling or diarrhea. All side effects, generally do not require medical attention unless the side effects are severe.
***Of course, use common sense when tasting poinsettias.
I am not a doctor and my advice is merely as such, advice.
Please consult your primary care physician or call 911 if you are faced with an emergency.***

Check out these websites for more information:

Friday, December 16, 2016

Juju on that beat

My son, is a musical theatre major.
He's hilarious.
Check out his page and subscribe.

https://youtu.be/ZJbTIEkECI4

Wednesday, December 14, 2016

So it was...

The life as it once was ...
No longer exists.

The aroma of fresh linens, baby powder and fresh air dissipates as the minutes tick...

New words, smiles and giggles
Are replaced with crayon drawings and fruit loop necklaces.

Mama replaced with C-A-T and C-A-R.

Pudgy rolls upon the legs of the new, form into muscle and the newness has faded...

No longer 2t, 5t or Juniors...

Muscles stretch and lengthen,
As bones grow.

Learning sounds and singing the ABC's gradually become Lol's and WTF's.

Birthday invitations, football games and play dates become fewer and fewer...

Smiles and giggles are gone.
Eye rolls and secrets become an unwelcome intruder.

Speaking together and family time, game night disappears with the ticking of the clock.

Faces become faint memories.
Hugs remembered with tears.

The scent of sweat, dirty boy and bonding is gone...
Replaced with saltiness, empty and lonely.

Times past are just a memory.
Memories hold the pieces together.

Nothing left to be broken.

The bird cannot fly without its wings.

Friday, December 9, 2016

Theory vs. History part 1

Long live English...
I was having a deep debate with Tripp, one evening and we were discussing his college major.
He plans to become a Creative Writing major with a minor in Psychology.
Interesting combination I thought at first.
Throughout our discussion he asked me a question.
" Do you think English majors should be required to take History of the English Language or English Theory & History. "
We debated this question and possible pros and cons for well over an hour.
English- One of the well known and highly used languages of the entire world.
Old English, Middle English, Anglo-Saxon English, and Latin are all words put together by symbols, markings and squiggles that in turn cause our mouth to make sounds to form words which in turn has made English our primary language, the language most of us use today.
Knowing the history of where words began, how they came about and why the letter a has been used instead of the æ is quite fascinating.
In addition to the history the reasoning behind the æ, ë, ß and ç are learning tools as well.
Why is the a connected to the e?
What are the two dots above the e?
What is the squiggly thing underneath the c?
What the heck is that funky b ish letter?
When did we stop using these and why?
Why did we decide English would be our primary language, why do we not draw photos instead of using words?
Why do we pronounce ellipsis the way that we do?
When do children learn to speak best?
Why do we speak?
All questions that I have asked.
I have many answers and though I feel well versed on the English language as of this moment, there are many other questions that arise.
Either way, Theory and History are both substantial and require great lengths of research, reading and investigating.
I do believe that in order to obtain a great word palate, both classes should be taught, not just in college but in grade school, middle school and high school.
Someone once said, " You will never know where you are going until you know where you have been."
I believe this statement not only applies to physical moments, but historically in language as well.
What do you think?
Danalthemom

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Autumn, winter and meloncoly

The days get colder as the months come to an end,

The reds, yellows, greens and browns empty the witch hand shaped woods,

The brisk wind swirls as mother Earth exhales awaiting a long sleep,

The chipmunks gather,

The birds sing the song of beauty and finality,

Mothers, sisters and friends gather, bundled up for outings of shopping and spending,

Fathers, Grandfathers and sons clad in forest green Camo, smelling of deer piss and coffee ready to kill the 12-point buck they had been vying all year. 

The transient bundled in thrift store patchwork clothing, pajamas and a Santa hat pushes her shopping cart along the road, talking to herself, she is missing a shoe, but nobody helps her. 

The sun begins to set,
The air gets colder,
The singing of the birds dissipates
And the houses light up

Red
Green
White

Some blink, some do not.

The giant snowmen gradually grows.

Reindeer turn there robotic heads in unison. 

Faint Mozart in the background can be heard. 

Smoke wisps out of chimney's as families return home. 

The transient watches, laughing to herself.
She shoves the stale biscuit into her mouth after she offers it to nothing beside her. 

The sky is dark. 
The day is over. 

Winter is near. 







Monday, October 17, 2016

IUD not IED

Sunday, September 18, 2016

IUD, not IED. Birth Control.

Do you know what an IUD is?

Many do not.

An IUD is an intrauterine device inserted in the uterus of a female to prevent pregnancy.

There are many types of IUD's
Check out this website:
https://bedsider.org/methods/iud

And this one.

http://www.cnn.com/2016/09/14/health/iud-birth-control-knowledge-gaps/index.html

Happy parenting.
Namasté
Danalthemom

Medicating children: Read labels

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Medicating children: Read labels

Many parents are over dosing their kids, study says.

Tips: 
1. Always read labels 
2. Syringe dosage is the golden tool
3. Weigh your child. 
4. Observe your child after administering medication.

http://www.cnn.com/2016/09/12/health/overdosing-kids-medicine-syringe/index.html

Blah, blah and a little more blah

Blah vs. Blah

Have you ever looked at your television and instantly wanted to throw it out the window?

I have.

I rarely, if ever, watch television for this particular reason.

Drama, BS and lies.

Arguing, Debates and Money.

Democrats vs. Republicans
Rich vs. Poor
Black vs. White
Coke vs. Pepsi

Honestly...

Who gives a shit?
I don't. 
Why must we endure this idiot infused bullshit?

Because we ARE stupid. 
Because we ARE obese. 
Because we ARE lazy.

Everyone has an opinion. 
Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one. ( I apologize in advance if you do not have an asshole-- if you don't personally have an ass Hole or sphincter you probably ARE an asshole, again my apologies to everyone you know)

These are my opinions, if you do not like them well, move along.

I am not anti-television or anti-coke or Pepsi or any of the other names I dropped, I am anti-lazy, anti-drama-encrusted, anti-moron.

I'm tired of parents being lazy and blaming teachers, ADD, or their own children.

**Parents: Newsflash**
Get off your ass and spend time with your children. 
Quit blaming others for your mistakes. 
Quit demanding your children to do things for you.

GET. 
OFF. 
YOUR. 
ASS.

Want your children to behave?
How about practicing what you preach.

Want your children to be respectful?
Look at yourself and how you treat authority.

** End of News flash **

Just in case, you reading this may be confused and unable to conjure up ideas of your own to spend time with your children.

Here you go.

**FREE: Fun things to do**

1. Go outside- Open the door and walk outside.

2. Go for a hike. 
amp.usatoday.com

3. Go collect rocks. 
http://www.kidsloverocks.com/html/guide_to_collecting.html

4. Go Geocaching. 
https://www.geocaching.com/play

5. Volunteer. 
http://www.miusa.org/resource/tipsheet/volunteerlinks

You are welcome. 
Now go do something. 
Namasté
Danalthemom

Saturday, September 17, 2016

Not a cool kid

Not a Cool Kid

As I look at today's generation of children, and back at my generation during adolescence through High School, I am saddened.
What happened to being a kid?
What happened to Adults taking care of the Adulting and children being able to be children?

Have we as parents really become "that" parent? Or those "parent's"?

The parents that overcompensate due to having a restricted or overly spoiled childhood?

Which has resulted in our children being spoiled, disrespectful and hateful.
These children do not understand the value of a dollar nor do they care to learn.
Instead of earning whatever the latest fad product may be, or buying it with their own money they beg and plead until one of two things happen:

1. The parent gives in because they are tired of listening to the child begging.

2. The child throws a fit, cops attitude, starts crying ane runs to the other parent to stress how "mean" you just were to them. (The child then gets double what ever it was that they wanted because parents do not communicate with each other it's only through the children.This is a typical broken family (historically speaking)

I never had the opportunity to be a spoiled brat, nor did I care to be a spoiled brat. I was often jealous of others and their belongings or stability or whatnot.
I watched people I went to school with, they really were pretty, but brainless and spoiled. (For the most part)

I grew up in a small town.
A REALLY small town.
We had a Walmart.
One Walmart, a K-Mart (about 45 mins away), Expensive boutiques, (which our family could never afford)  and a mall in "The City".

I never visited these places until high School and into adulthood.

I was made fun of throughout childhood because of the clothing I wore, the family I came from, and the social status in which my family kept.

"Trailer Trash"
"Skank"
"Druggie Girl"

Terminology often heard in hushed whispers or written on the bathroom walls.

The point of this particular blog is to reminisce of my childhood and analyse why children are behaving in the manner that they are.

Now, that I am an adult i have realized the following:

Understanding the value of a dollar makes a lot more sense when you do not have one.

I realize that happiness is not bought but self-made. Though children (mine especially) like to accuse parents of this frequently.

I understand that true friends are present in ones life always. They are not around  24/7 but are present when needed.

I understand my children do not like me, thats ok. I know I  am doing a great job parenting if they dislike me, most of the time.

When I was a little kid, I couldn't wait to be an adult to make my own rules, buy my own stuff ect. I realize now that Adulting sucks.

I want my children to be children as long as possible, without having fear, without being spoiled and without peanut gallery comments stated to belittle or demean them or their parents.

But who am I?
I am not a cool kid.

Friday, September 16, 2016

Join me on Poshmark

Hi!

I love Poshmark, the #1 app to buy and sell fashion, and know you will love it too! Make money and shop over 5,000 brands at up to 70% off. It's fun and easy - I promise!

Join Dana on Poshmark

Sign up with code NVIVW to get $5 off your first order.

- Danalthemom

Navy Ball: What (NOT) to wear.

Good morning folks:
Do you or your significant other plan on attending an armed forces ball?
Are you confused on the attire?
Here you go, learn and be on key.

http://militaryoneclick.com/what-to-and-not-to-wear-military-ball-fashion-and-etiquette/

Courtesy of: Militaryoneclick.com
Written by: http://militaryoneclick.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Sarah-Peachey.jpg

Thursday, September 15, 2016

Join Mercari!!

Use my code "JHBCWQ" to join Mercari and get $2 off your first purchase! https://www.mercari.com/dl/

Thursday, September 8, 2016

I want to just be.

🔴🔴Attention friends, family & Obama: 🔴🔴

I would like to apologize for my hiatus as of late.
My life has become a whirlwind of unorganized chaos.
I am at a loss for words and happiness at the moment while I am pursuing my way to a happier, more productive and less stressful life.
I love you all, you have all been a tremendous part of the creation of me. Now I must put all the pieces together and become who I am meant to be.
Please bear with me.
Again, I apologize for being distant, missing events or not responding to messages, emails or texts.
Love you all.
XXOO

Saturday, September 3, 2016

The sun sets and rises

As I gaze at the river, the waters are calm.
The air is warm and humid.
The smell is putrid.

The foliage lush and green, a sign that summer is in full swing
With the birds chirping relentlessly and the families big and small riding bikes and strolling, waiting on food or trying to get into shape.

All unaware I am watching them.

The smell of BBQ fills my nostrils from a nearby restaurant.

I sit and watch as a sweat-covered gangly man, scratches his nose as sweat drips down his face.

The fat little girl rides her bike, trying to keep up with the rest of her family. Poor girl, with the tear-filled eyes.

The mom, with two youngsters, stops suddenly. She has a scowl on her face as she pulls the boy aside scolding him for something I cannot hear.
The young girl pouts, as her brother's tears run down his face.

A blonde bimbo with enormous fake breasts zooms by on her name brand bike, probably the first time she's ever ridden it.
Her husband, I assume is close behind.

The young moms with helmets trying to lead by example.
As their youngsters ride by.

A big lady with a northern accent yells at her her father, "you have to push the red button"
Her son, Lucian starts walking down the path--
Beep, beep, beep
The horn continues.
"Dad, the red button..  Lucian wait..."
" OK Patricia."yells the dad from the white suburban.
They family starts down the path.
The horn begins again as they disappear around the bend.

Oh hell.

Lucian comes running back, he has a speech impediment and cannot pronounce his R's correctly.
He is followed by his sister.

Observations.
Being aware of one's surroundings.
Being aware.
Just being.

Namaste'.

Sunday, August 21, 2016

Quality vs insanity

Good afternoon, good evening and morning...

My life as most would say has not been easy.
I am the atypical stereotype female, most would say.
Broken family, missing father, younger siblings, working single mother, bad grades, bad attitude, constant judgement by ones that shouldn't.

Blah, blah, blah

I am an adult now.
My life has drastically changed for better and worse.
Life cycles evolve, people change
Loved ones dissappear and new friends are made

The past is the past.
I have forgiven, but will never forget.

Certain scents, sounds and places fill my emotional psyche to a plethora of feelings internally and externally.
I have realized this is the way of the mind.

The mind is powerfully made.
The mind is a mother board of information in which we only access pieces and bits.

Why is this?

Do we choose getting today over as our goal?
We have evolved into 4 process robotic zombies.

Process 1. open our eyes- damn, still alive...
Process 2. Commence repetitive daily routine
Process 3. Retire daily routine
Process 4. Close eyes- pray for a better day

I state these witnessed facts as an observation of human life.

Am I guilty of acting on the Robotic Zombie Process, most definitely.

Do I strive today to be, do, act and persevere as though I am able to achieve all of my goals, hopes and dreams, most definitely.

Life is short.
Stress is high.

To be happy is a choice.
To not sweat the small stuff, is a choice.
To take baby steps in life to "stop and smell the roses" is a choice.
To act out in a classless and tactless manner due to a negative experience is a choice.

What choices will I make today to improve my quality of life?

Saturday, July 2, 2016

Dear Chattanooga, TN

Word to the wise:
Chattanooga is an amazing city. 
Like any and all places, there are flaws. 
This particular letter I wrote to the CEO of a hospital. 
I'm ashamed to be a part of this hospital. 
Something must be done!!!

Of course, I was fired. 
Anyone interested in a lawsuit?

Monday, May 30, 2016

To my baby bears

One day as you both grow into men and time passes by,

You may look back and wonder why...

Why didn't you fight, mom?

Why did you just cry, raise your hand to your cheek and wave goodbye?

My dear loves, you are the world to me, always have been and always will be. 

It wouldn't have mattered what I said, because your dad is the best as he has implanted in your head. 

No, I'm not perfect but neither is he. There is no need for name calling because soon you will see. 

As, I wallow around my life by myself

I stand in the background just waiting and watching.

I miss you boys so,

It took everything out of me when i let you go. 

My heart is broken, fragile and weak but this is for you guys so please stop and think. 

Who hugged you when you fell down?

Who took you to the doctor, the dentist and zoo?

It's was me. Your mom. because I love you two.

I will always be, regardless of the spite that you have against me. 

I love you forever, to the moon and back. 

Nothing can stop that, forever it will be true, even when I'm old and my hair is blue. 

Have a good life, I hope that all of your dreams come true. 

And always remember I will always be here for you. 

Love always-

Mom

XXOO 

Thursday, May 5, 2016

Self Improvement? Society.

As I sit and ponder philosophical ideals and ways to improve myself, I have determined the following: I am unique, I am a dreamer and I am honest.
I consider myself to be a Optimist Realist.

I like to observe others, I try to be careful NOT to speak my mind when I observe rather absurd behavior or unequal treatments.
(Those filter things most people have, I lack.
I'm on the patch, and working on holding my tongue.)

Location:
Suburb city park, midday. Approximately 1:30pm

Surroundings:
Shopping centers, High end car detailing, lawyers offices, transients, mom's dressed to the 9's and children wearing clothing they have never worn before.

Observations:
5 mothers approached the park with their children wearing what appeared to be brand new light colored clothing. (Not ideal for a muddy, germy park), passing by a man playing a guitar, yanking their children away from him as if he may attack them.  I recognized one of the mothers.
She walked over wearing a pencil skirt and heels and attempted to make pleasantries. (Fail)
As she walked back to her play group or socialite club (whatever it may be) I have concluded the following:

Most people are fake: I do not mean the literal version of fake (unless you have the narcissus as a friend) but the internal and external everyday actions of people. The general population from my perspective is selfish, self-absorbed, keeping up with the Jones' , money loving liars.
People ask how your day is, they really do not want an answer it's a learnt behavior. 
Wake-up calls for the egocentric and bad decision makers are non-exsistant and they tend to care only of themselves. Unless....
Helping a person may reward them with money and/or other selfishly wanted item.
This is the only way to get these specimens out of their own needs and wants.
Of course, these are my observations of a group of 5 women. 

What do you think?

Friday, April 22, 2016

7 dumbass trendy teen observations.

7 Dumbass Trends I have observed with Teenagers. 

April 22, 2016
Written by: Danalthemom

1. Cutting: this is dangerous. If you harm your body in any way to ease your emotional distress, you are in need of psychological help.  Please call the national self-harm/ suicide hotline. (1-800-551-800) It's a confidential phone call. Self Harm in any manner does not make you cool. In fact it makes you more susceptible to many types of infections. 

2. Eraser challenge: wtf? 🤔 Why do you want a permanent scar from a pencil eraser because  you HAD to prove that you were cool enough to do it. Really. You are not cool, you are stupid for accepting a dumbass challenge. 

3. Salt/ice: Are kids really doing this? Yes. seriously. This can also be referred to as a chemical burn. It hurts like hell. This only makes you cool when you touch the ice. Don't do this dumbass challenge. 

4. Chain letters: it's annoying, stop sending stupid ass shit via email, Twitter, Instagram or whatever other means of communication that is chosen. -I'm not going to win a million dollars -get my legs cut off-be sent to Colorado for endless "Toke-a" parties- become a princess of India-be struck by lightening or inherit Bill Gates' estate. It's not happening. 

5. Mine Craft: I am certain pixelated art is uber enlightening as well as that dumbass that posts videos on YouTube. Oregon Trail was educational as well on the late 80's lets reintroduce that game⁉️.  
Can someone explain why this is a "learning game"?                              
Reading a book is also a "learning game". Usually it requires one to be able to read though....🖥📚
6. Hyper sexual everything:  I remember when I was in middle school we didn't talk much about sex, only in health class and that was rare. It wasn't until High School did our generation become more sexually aware. Today, in 2016, turn your television on for 10 minutes, channel surf, how many messages that talk about sex, have sexual references, hidden messages. I logged 10 out of 15 commercials. Have you seen what girls are wearing today? Wow. Cover-up, don't be a slut. 

7. Bullying: what happened to the good old days when people actually talked out issues?  
Had a a small brawl, then became friends again.  🤕💪🏻                                    
  Now the kids have evolved into mini-demons picking, harassing, threatening, "ganging up on".        Guess what? 
No one is spared, not the cool kids, not the smart kids or the goth kids or any other "type".          
 Kids are bullied at school, home, the bus, on all forms of social media... ect ect ect.                                                 Wtf, is wrong with kids nowadays?       
  I will tell you.                                         
We as parents, are no longer allowed to discipline our children, the way we were disciplined.    
                          •Gone are the days where the dreaded "go pick a switch" was the ultimatum when   wrongdoings were done.                                                
      •No more soap in the mouth for cursing or disrespect.⁉️                                           
      •No more sending a kid to bed hungry because he "doesn't like" what you made.      🍏🍆🍓🍳                                              •No more instinctive slaps to the cheek when profanities or disrespect spew out of a child's mouth.                         😱All of these are now considered child abuse.  🤗🤔😡                                               
  •We can, of course, over medicate our children because they all have ADD or Bi-Polar disorder.                             

Mainly because we are too damn lazy to actually listen, respond and react to our children. We instead focus on ourselves, our needs and buy the love of our children...                           
Spoiling them with fast food 🍔🌮🌭
an endless supply or violent video games and consoles. 💻🕹.            
Way to go USA. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
•America wonders why our mental health rates are rising along with obesity in children and lower test scores, must be the damn chicken. 🐔.•


Can you think of any others?
Let me know. 
✌🏻️❤️😊
Danalthemom 

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Supporting the "Gay" community

To the ones that spread hatred towards the LGBT community. 

I support anyone involved within the community. I also despise those spread hatred. So, here's my Insight and thoughts on the subject  from a non-gay white girl perspective. 

-Don't be afraid of what others think. 
-Our higher power made you who you are today. (not sure if you are Christian so please don't take offense) 
Embrace that. 
-It takes courage to stand up and reveal that you are a Homosexual, bisexual, transgender, lesbian ect. 
-You are very courageous in many ways. 
-Be unique. 
-Be yourself. 
-Don't let others take away your happiness. 
-If your neighbors, "friends", co-workers, family ect. interfere, call the police. 
-Your personal business is not their business and vice versa. You have rights. 

Here is a simple remedy to alleviate your stressors. 
-I would do is type a letter to said individual using verbiage below. 


Dear (name):

As you may know, I am a LGBT individual. My boyfriend, husband, girlfriend, wife,  significant other is As well. 

Please be aware of this, as you continue to berate me, discriminate against me, destroy my property and attempt to humiliate me. I have rights as an American citizen, I am free to love whom I choose, as well as being entitled to freedom of speech. 

 If you insist upon making a mockery of yourself, please exit my life, move, or talk to the wall. As these negative and hate-filled comments are discriminating and hurt me, which I am sure is your purpose. 

I do not appreciate your negativity and hatred towards me and the community I am currently involved within. 

I'm certain, you hold skeletons in your closet or secrets as well. 
I was brave enough to reveal mine. 

Your continued harassment and guile will not be tolerated and I will be forced to file legal charges against you if it continues. 

"Those without sin, cast the first stone."
Wishing Happiness, peace and love
Namasté 
Your horrible gay neighbor. 
Xxoo

Friday, February 19, 2016

Wage Gaping: Myth or Fact part 1

Wage Gap: Male vs. Female Part I

Most people report that they believe they are paid wages similar to those of the opposite sex. 
Statistical surveyed studies prove that the Wage Gap controversy between men and women is  considerable due to problems within the workplace, dedication, attention to detail, innovative thinking and physical attributes (required for particular positions) and the infamous "don't ask, don't tell" (unofficial policy of sharing wages or salaries with co-workers.) Lest we forget generalities of human nature and learnt perception from early childhood to adulthood. 

Case Studies & Surveys:
These two generalized accounts do not add the general major factors when determining raises and reviews. Top reasoning surveyed accounting for problems in the workplace:
1. Missing Work
2. Working Overtime
3. Dangerous working conditions 

Statistics show:

  •  Men spend more time at work, they are 60% more likely to die at work and  choose educations in fields that are classically "manly" such as mathematics or engineering. 
  • While Women spend less time at work, are family focused and choose education in Humanities, Communication and Marketing. 
Though, over the years there has been an occupational shift resulting in tremendous Wage Gaping. 

General wants and Needs:
I believe the gender pay debate boils down to what people want in general. If one wants a more comfortable job, or one that does not stress the brain/body so much, then a lower pay is to be expected.

I believe some (not most) men are willing to risk more, than women to get ahead, which tends to make them more pragmatic, harder working and less focused on family/social activities while women are more pragmatic in other aspects of life, like procreation and family/home construction, which contrasts with risk taking. Therefore determining that a man works harder than a woman and deserves more money than she. 

Apples to Oranges
Pay gap studies do not compare engineers to social workers. Generally, what statistics  fail to consider is basic social conditioning that we're all exposed to from childhood onward.

  • Women tend to settle for comfy jobs and don't do "real" work as indicated by several Harvard studies indicating that a man's quality of work is inherently better than a woman's. 
It's the same perception that many people in society share, and that's why when an employer goes to pay his or her workers, they often subconsciously pay a female employee less compared to a male counterpart. 

  • The inverse can also happen in fields where women are perceived as the natural workers. In humanities, the man will often be paid less. 

Overall Wage Gap suffrage:
Across the World, most to all genders agree that it is more common for women to suffer from the wage gap than men. It's rarely intentional, but this type of snap judging is happening all the time subconsciously. This is why the Gender Pay controversy and its transparency over salaries, becomes a topic of debate. 

Don't ask, Don't Tell
Most employees themselves can determine whether or not their pay is fair in comparison to their co-workers. This is why the employer states "Do not share your salary with your co-workers" 
Most would like to trust that they are making the same rate without knowing for sure, though most do not adhere and fail to follow the proper "don't ask, don't tell" salary policy within their company. Which is human nature and curiosity kills the cat. When addressing pay inequality it is beneficial to both men and women because pay disparity happens to everyone depending upon the field of choice. Regardless of educational experience, qualifications and seniority. 

Engineering and Sciences:
Men are perceived as inherently better in Mathematics and Science, boys are encouraged at young ages to pursue these fields while women are pushed more towards the humanities or administrative fields. 
Taking into consideration social conditioning and societal construction the entire field of psychology is diminished and the debate is over. Nobody wins.

Life moves on. 

Capabilities: Men vs. Women
Men and women are equally capable of most tasks, although American women are  generally not encouraged to go into engineering and science and thus they do not pursue the fundamentals required to obtain similar opportunities and build up the skill set required. During the last 10 years, women and men have exceeded expectations, changed and evolved from the once gender-specific roles in which they were encouraged to disengage from due to various factors. Peer influence, cultural upbringings, educational background and the initial perception of society that we all carry from birth.

"Men Hunt, Women have babies."

Our gender does not determine our self value, our intelligence nor does it determine our future occupation, current occupation or our destiny.

Our gender basics have been taught from birth, passed from Generation to Generation.

For Example:
Boys 1950's-Present
Little boys historically are given toy guns, allowed to get dirty and collect bugs.
Collect plastic army men, GI Joes and baseball cards.
Open doors for women and girls and elderly.
Taught to be chivalrous and stand up for what they believe in.
Boys are taught to be tough and not cry.
Be the protector and "whoop some ass", if they feel the need.
Learn to hunt, because that's a real man.

Girls 1950's-Present
While the little girls were taught to wear dresses, curl their hair, always be proper.
The girls were never taught to hunt, allowed to play in the dirt, or with plastic army men.
They were given Barbies, dolls and costumes to play dress-up, an easy-bake-oven to cook.
Instilled in their brains they would be mothers, housewives and nurses.
Taught that danger is for the boys and fixing the problems of others is a priority.
These basics are learnt from birth:
Read an old magazine, the proof is in the pudding as they say.
It's nature (Men) versus (Women) nurture. 
Thus, the reasoning behind the gender swapping change and diverse employment spread through the sexes. We are all unique. We have our own brains and it took us 50 years to realize it.
For this same reason we Americans as a whole are pushing for equal treatment of men and women, so that the same opportunities will present themselves to both genders now and in the future for all people red, white, black, gay, straight. 

Physical Differences: 
Scientific studies show: Men's brains are better with math and spatial reasoning and hands on tasks, while women's brains lean more towards language, communication and fine motor skills.
Science- Our DNA, our socioeconomic status, and Education ultimately determines the way that men and women develop and which skill sets are dominant.   

Internal and External differences:
Men and women are different.
Both physically and mentally.
Size, strength, and balance are a few examples of the physical side.
Mentally men and women have completely different brains.
The average male brain is 10% larger, and contains more grey matter, while women contain more white matter. 
The different areas of the brain, and they way they are developed differ quite dramatically ultimately determining the career path, education and skills needed for the career of choice.
Although times are changing, occupations between sexes are becoming more and more diverse alas causing the increase in Wage gaping. 

Final statement: 
The Gender wage gap is not a myth, it is hardcore fact. Judging a potential employee is human nature.
"Always make a good first impression".
One of many common statements we are taught as young children. 

Ultimately, Men and women are going to be judged based on their gender, and the general bias of who is more capable to get the job done, life is unfair like that sometimes, it is human nature. 
Human nature is instinctual, and rightfully so, as it is backed up by many scientific studies and will likely continue for years to come. 

Thoughts?
Peace, love & Happiness


Tuesday, February 16, 2016

More than you can handle?

2/16/2016:
As I write this I ponder the world around me, advice I have been given and how I can change the chaos that surrounds me.
I can't, I can only control myself.

I have been through several life changing events within my entire life.

It's been said, "God will not give you more than you can handle" and "Everything happens for a reason". 

These two statements, are very powerful.

1 Corinthians: 10:13
Women's Devotional Bible (NIV)

"No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is Faithful, he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."



My interpretation: 
I believe this actual scripture involves temptation, not tribulations. 
I do believe things happen due to free will, succumbing to sin and leaving God, not putting him first and not thinking before acting or just being a victim of circumstance.  
Life is not fair. 
Life is more of a game than just black and white. 
Things happen, good and bad. 
Things happen to everyone. 
Rich, Poor, Old, New, Gay, Straight ect. 
Sometimes we survive and sometimes we do not. 
I believe that the way you handle yourself when going through a valley of despair ultimately determines your character. 
Humbling yourself and asking for help, praying, helping others, and living the Golden Rule will help move one from the valley back to the mountain. 

My second topic: 
"Everything happens for a reason." This actual quote was stated by Aristotle in his early years. 
"The well-known Greek Philosopher Aristotle, believed that everything happens for a reason, always. And that every experience in your life, was designed to shape you and reform you into the ultimate and greatest version, that could ever imagine yourself to be. The only thing that prevents this, is having the wisdom to see it."



We are all human, we all have free will and we all go through valleys and mountains. 
Try to think positive. 
Know that wherever you are in life, someone is doing worse than you. 
Be thankful. 
Send encouraging thoughts to someone else, this will refresh them and relieve your pain. 

My challenge to you: (pick 1 or many)
1. Buy someone a coffee today.
2. Pay for their newspaper
3. Send an actual piece of mail to someone, let them know you are thinking of them. 
4. Call someone and tell them you love them. 
5. Smile at someone. 
6. Let that person in front of you while you are driving. 
7. Smile at yourself. 
8. Make a funny face to a child. 
9. Put up trash on the road. 
10. Pass out homeless bags. 

Peace, love and happiness. 
DM

Friday, February 12, 2016

Men are human.

Men: They are human too. 

February 12, 2016

Today I was reading my "Women's Devotional Bible", Proverbs 12.
I came across a short devotional written by: Nancy Corbett Cole. As I read this devotional I had an epiphany, I am guilty of deprecating humor at my husbands expense. 
I have never really thought that me, "enjoying to make my husband blush" was deprecating. 
It never really even ever came to mind. 
In society and in childhood we as women are taught that men are ego-filled, sexual, over-worked individuals and that if they cry or have any sense of emotion they are weak. 
This is clearly a false statement. 
Men, are human. 
They have feelings. 
They hurt, they get embarrassed, they have an overwhelming sense of potential failure to family, friends and employers, they are tender yet keep a strong she'll to cover all I said above. 

We, as women tend to treat men as if they do not have these problems or feelings. 
We learned this from adolescence and have carried it into adulthood. 
"He can handle it, He's a man, It doesn't bother him" common statements I myself have thought. 
These statements are so very false, men have feelings. The validity of my adolescent and current thoughts of men have been extremely humiliating. 
Not intentional or spitefully, but laughing whilst he cringed inside, I never realized how I could be damaging my relationship as well as my children's potentional outlook on life. 

Wow, how immature, unloving and humiliating I have been. 

Being a woman, I have never put myself into the mental shoes of a man and thought, "I may be hurting his (my significant others) feelings. 
This never occurred to me. Not once. 

I have been envious of men, yearning to be treated equally, paid equally and treated like a woman. 

Though I have never thought of the feelings, thoughts or possible hurt that men go through on a daily basis. 

I am quite ashamed of myself. 
I feel quite selfish and less understanding when I always thought that gaining a laugh at my significant others expense would be helpful. When in all reality, I was harming him more than helping. 

Men are human.
Living, breathing mammals. 
Keepers of the home. 
Those are huge tasks. 
Probably more overwhelming, than one may think. 

Take a moment today to apologize to the man in your life. 
Listen to them. 
Empathize with them. 
Understand they are human too. 

A great scripture verse that would reiterate my thought process would be:
Proverbs 12:18
"Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."

Grab your significant other and tell them, I am sorry.